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When heirs disagree

Disagreement between heirs is unfortunately common. Nalenta is not built for those situations: you need a notary, mediator or lawyer. Here are the routes.

By Laurens De Leeuw4 min readPublished on 13 April 2026

Rather not face this paperwork alone? Nalenta guides you through it for 129 euros.

Talk first, with a calm third party

Almost every dispute between heirs starts small and escalates through poor communication. A conversation with a neutral third party (a notary, mediator or experienced family member outside the heirs) often resolves more in one or two sessions than years of legal battle.

Important things to align on first:

  • who collects what information?
  • how do we divide personal possessions (photos, jewellery, clothes)?
  • who organises the home settlement?
  • which deadline do we set internally?

Notarial settlement

If conversation fails you can jointly appoint a notary to handle the whole estate. The notary builds the inventory, files the inheritance tax return and prepares a deed of distribution that all heirs sign.

Advantage: one person owns the overview. Disadvantage: notary fees are higher (often 2,000 to 10,000 EUR for a complete settlement).

A liquidator via the court

If even with the notary you cannot agree, an heir can petition the court to appoint a liquidator (vereffenaar). The court usually appoints an estate-law lawyer, with authority to divide the estate even against an heir's will.

The liquidator is paid from the estate, not from heirs personally.

Court proceedings

In the worst case an heir starts distribution proceedings in court. That easily takes one to three years and is costly on both sides. To be avoided where possible.

When Nalenta is not the right place

Our triage refuses estates where heirs disagree. Reason: an automated tool cannot resolve a conflict, and disagreement requires professional guidance to avoid personal liability and escalation.

If you started Nalenta and disagreement appears, pause the filing until the dispute is resolved and engage a notary or estate lawyer.

Tip

The faster you involve a third party, the cheaper it is. Waiting until someone has "taken a position" always makes a reasonable distribution harder.

Frequently asked questions

What is a mediator?

An independent third party who helps you reach an agreement through conversation. They do not judge but facilitate, often in 2 or 3 sessions. Pairs well with a notary who legally records the final agreement.

Can I buy out the other heirs from my share?

Yes. If you want a specific item (the home for example) and the others want money, you can buy them out. Value is determined and you pay them the difference. A notary records this in a deed of distribution.

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